progress crashed

how long does it take to get over someone? once i actually thought i was over bryan. every guy i was with reminded me of him. i couldnt be with someone when all i thought about was bryan. it was unfair. there came a guy, i didnt think of bryan once while i was with him, bryan didnt exist in my world anymore. it made me happy. thought i was finally over him. then something happened. suddenly being with this new guy didnt matter anymore. it made bryan sad. and all i wanted to do was run into his arms and tell him he was the only guy i cared for. that the other guy didnt matter, that i never stopped loving him. thats when i realized that bryan never did stop loving me. he still cared. he just pretended that he didnt care. i saw all his lies through his eyes.

all the progress ive made throughout these months crashed. i was still in love with him. i still missed him. i still wanted to be with him. the progress i have made trying to be friends with bryan crashed. we went to talking and laughing liked we never broke up to not speaking to each other, not making eye contact. im back where i started. and what makes it worst is that he keeps taking off his t-shirt. i keep having to control myself and try not to feel his chest. there is a small fuzzy spot on his chest. you cant see it but you can feel it. i keep wanting to play with it. god bryan, youre not making it easier for me!